Family goals can be challenging as children grow up, hit different milestones, and change interests. If you have boys and girls, like I do, there is a whole other layer to add, as boys are more inclined to want to do the physical, messy work of building forts, playing in the mud, and building or smashing stuff, while girls tend to want to craft, have tea parties and dress up. We make a lot of family goals in our home. Some goals we set and get done, and some get pushed back on the priority list and enter the void of undone tasks. It's important to remind ourselves that a goal is merely a marker of where we could go, but God will inevitably decide if that will be our destination. As Christians, we want to do God's will and build His kingdom.

Proverbs 16:9 says:

A man's heart deviseth his way: But the LORD directeth his steps.

The saying 'God Willing' comes to mind when I'm working on some new project idea or possible goal. It's not always clear if we should do something, so I am constantly reassessing and looking at what we are doing as a family and how it affects the dynamics within our home. My top priority in evaluating our family goals is our children's character. I look at the heart issues that have shown up over the days, weeks, or months and asses where these have come from and if we need to pivot or change what we are currently doing as a family. Sometimes, our routines are off, and we are in need of more structure; this happens especially during the holidays and then again when we're getting back into the swing of homeschooling. There are also inevitable seasons of unrest, like when having a baby; this includes the lead-up during pregnancy to birth as preparations are being made, and then there's moving house. Moving house also includes moving to a different state or country. Of course, the bigger the move, the more it affects the family. I was born in the UK, and my family moved to Australia when I was a teenager. My husband and I, for the first 11 years, moved 13 times. We've thankfully spent the last three years in one place. So, I know a great deal about the horrors of moving, the effects of inconsistency, and the mindset shifts that need to take place to reassess and get back into the swing of life.

One of the most important things for Christian families to do is take action. Inaction causes us to seize up, become slovenly, and do nothing of value. Action brings life, longevity and when taken as a family, it brings a sense of unity and empowerment. Many Christians fall for the trap of waiting. They think that becuase they can't 'hear' or don't 'feel' God they shouldn't act. There are always reasons to do or not do things, and it is our job to discern with the sound mind God has given us. You may not get the sign you desire, and we must not give God ultimatums. When we say we will only do it when God has given us a sign, we essentially demand that He do something for us. There's a difference between asking, saying thank you, and demanding that God do something for us to act.

Proverbs 26:13-16 says:

The slothful man saith, There is a lion in the way; a lion is in the streets. As the door turneth upon his hinges, so doth the slothful upon his bed. The slothful hideth his hand in his bosom; it grieveth him to bring it again to his mouth. The sluggard is wiser in his own conceit than seven men that can render a reason.

Questioning our own thoughts is a weapon against the sluggard mind. We don't want to deceive ourselves into thinking we are doing God's will when really we are choosing inaction due to our own fear of speaking or taking action in the world. Fear can affect even the bravest of people, but our God is greater than anything we could fear on Earth.

If you're finding that you don't take action or that there is true reluctance, it may be because you lack self-worth. Perhaps you feel unworthy or like you're not enough. Although I began talking about family goals, you must remember that you are the leader, the one who takes the charge and picks the adventures and goals to set and achieve. If you feel inadequate or like you're not enough, this will likely hold your family back from achieving great things in the world. We can encourage and build our children's strength by showing them our strength of character. There is a reason why so many kids identify with David; in the story of David and Goliath, he is strong, believes, and takes action. David knew who he was, and most importantly, he knew who God is. God has a plan, and He works for our good.

Consistency and stability enable us to form great habits and routines. The sad truth is there is no secret or fix-all. You just have to do it. You have to take the necessary actions to start and continue habits. There is no leaving this or that for later. If you venture off the plan and do something different from the usual routine, get back onto the plan or tweak it if it needs tweaking. We are not made to be still like a rock. We are made to grow and change. So many people fall into a rigid and stagnant existence with unhealthy habits like watching Netflix and chilling every night. Believe it or not, even waking up late and pressing snooze seven times is a routine. It might not be fruitful, but it is still a habitual routine.

What do you want your family's routines to look like?
What do you want to make habitual?
How will you bring stability into the home?

Regardless of their size, the goals you set can create lasting memories and experiences that you and your children will cherish. They can also instill character traits that become part of your child's personality and overall attitude towards life. You can cultivate specific characteristics in your child by aligning your goals with your family's values. These traits can be identified through careful observation of your child's current challenges or behavioral issues.

For instance:

If your child is shy, you can boost their confidence by organizing a family play based on their favorite book, show, or Bible story. Everyone can participate, and the play can be showcased to grandparents or other supportive family members, fostering a sense of accomplishment and confidence in your child.
If your child Lacks focus, a great project or goal might be some kind of family-building project.

Has a bad attitude about doing anything, with this you could make a family project where everyone gets a turn at picking what the whole family does once a week for however long it takes to get through all the family members, of course, with this, there can be budget limits and so on. Still, you can get the whole family to be creative to make sure everyone gets their turn, even if it is a little out of budget. This can lead to smaller goals that involve money-making projects like selling lemonade, cupcakes, or firewood to save money for a desired activity.

What heart issues are you seeing in your children?
What activities could your children grow from the most?
What kinds of activities would your budget allow?
How might you cut back on other expenses to afford to do the family activities and achieve the family goals you would like to?

Goal and Project Ideas

> Wake-up early and consistently.
> Have a family reading time.
> Get to bed at a specific time every night.
> Growing a veggie patch.
> Learning a craft or skill, like sewing or carpentry, or building something as a family, Like a tiny house or a cubby house.
> Volunteering at a soup kitchen.
> Picking up rubbish at the beach or a park.

Hebrews 13:16 says:

"But to do good and to communicate forget not: for with such sacrifices God is well pleased."

When it comes to goal setting and completing, we have to look to the bigger picture. Maybe it's to build a child's confidence, be charitable to others, and share the gospel or something completely strange; a big picture reason is necessary; these big picture reasons for me always boil down to two things, character traits, and memories. What memories do I want my children to have of childhood? How do I want them to feel about those memories? And what characteristics do I want my child to have the most strength in? Goal setting should never be just about the now or the foreseeable future but about a transcendent legacy that gets passed down and retold. The memories we create now can be cherished and held close for comfort in the future, to strengthen faith and build courage in those hard seasons. We can have all these things as long as we look and listen to our children, our spouse, and we take on the responsibility to build these incredible things into our family culture.